How to Make a Good First Impression on Your Girlfriend’s Parents

I remember the first time I met my girlfriend’s parents.  Surprisingly nervous, my usual cool, calm and collected self went out of the window.  My girlfriend told me not to worry and just be myself, but I was still absolutely terrified.

Over two years later, we are still together.  Her parents turned out to be nice people and have supported our relationship from the get-go.  If you are meeting your girlfriend’s parents for the first time, it’s important to make a good first impression.

Tip 1: The Qualities For Success

If you had a daughter, what kind of guy would you want her to date?  You would want him to be respectful, intelligent, motivated, and honest.  Although you shouldn’t be fake, you should try to emulate these characteristics.  If you don’t have these qualities, than it’s probably not the right time to meet her parents. 

Tip 2: Dress Well

The way you dress says a lot about your character – if you take the time to present yourself in a fashionable and more importantly, clean manner you are already a step ahead of the game.   Make sure your clothes are washed, stain-free, and stylish.  On the doorstep, double-check your shoes for mud and dog poop (I speak from experience).  Avoid showing up in sweat pants and flip-flops.  No overly graphic clothes or anything that would classify you as a trouble maker. 

If you have piercings or tattoos, make sure your girlfriend warns her parents about them ahead of time.  Remove facial piercings and earrings until her parents get to know you a little better.  Yes, we know that it’s ‘you,’ but you’ll want to start off with a clean slate.  Not everybody is as open minded as they should be, and a simple piercing can carry with it a lot of negative connotations.

Tip 3: Show Respect

You can show respect by caring for their daughter.  When you arrive, open doors for her and wait until she sits before you take your seat.  Do the same for her mother.  Don’t start eating until everyone else has their food in front of them.  Help her mother clear the table and wash up when you’re done eating (the last will get you a lot of brownie points).

Upon meeting her father, shake his hand firmly and look him in the eye when speaking.  Remember to smile as you do so.  Bring flowers for her mother if she thinks it is appropriate.  Carry yourself in a confident, but not cocky, manner.

When it comes to conversation, try to complement their daughter whenever appropriate.   Make sure your compliments are on the lines of “she is one of the most interesting and intelligent people I’ve met”.  Avoid groping her at the dinner table, french-kissing her at any time, or mentioning her sexual abilities, even if they are good.

Tip 4: Express Appreciation

Be courteous by showing your appreciation.  If her mom makes dinner or if her father invites you out to a nice restaurant, make sure to thank them for their time and effort.  Manners are extremely important during any first impression, especially your potential parents-in-law.

Tip 5: Avoid Blowing Your Own Trumpet

If you have any good qualities you can point them out, but don’t become a one-man marching band.  Wait until you’re asked rather than launching into a great speech about how you are working with the U.N. to eliminate world hunger.  Be careful not to boast. 

Are you getting your bachelor’s degree, do you have a good job, do you do volunteer work down at the animal shelter?  All of these are great qualities that are sure to impress your girlfriend’s parents.  If nobody brings them up, be sure to slip them into the conversation, but casually.

In Summary

There are a lot of unwritten rules for first impressions.  Most of them rely on your common sense.  You don’t need to lie or pretend to be someone you are not.  However, it is advisable to be selective when sharing information and depending on the situation, to stretch the truth a bit. 

When it comes down to it, your girlfriend’s parents are just looking for someone who genuinely cares about their daughter and who is looking out for her best interests.  If you truly love her, then it will show and you’ll have nothing to worry about.