Dating in the Workplace a Survival Guide

Dating in the workplace has always been frowned on by society.  While it can  seem like the ultimate in convenience to date someone who you see all the time, there are some things that you need to be aware of before you embark on that would-be romance. 

One of the things that you will have to be prepared for if you choose to start dating someone at work is that people will talk – and gossip will quickly spread to people you may not want it to, such as your boss or your clients.  This is simply unavoidable – coworkers love to gossip about others, particularly those in the workplace, and they may not care who overhears them.  Even though you might think that gossip will not affect your dating life, it can certainly make things very uncomfortable at work, especially if you have to make a presentation or go on a business trip together, and all your colleagues start whispering and nudging each other!

You may also be cautioned by your boss.  Although it is not legal to fire someone because of their dating preferences, your boss will probably want to make his feelings known to you upon finding out.  Also be aware that if your relationship is judged to create a ‘conflict of interest’ within your position, your boss may make that grounds for your dismissal.  An example of this is if you are you’re dating a superior who uses his or her influence to get you promoted or moved to a better department, at the expense of someone who deserves the promotion more.

Another consideration is that too much of a good thing is still too much.  While you will probably enjoy seeing that guy or girl all the time at first, eventually it will become too much and you may even start to get sick of them.  And what if you move in together?  You’ll then see your loved one all day… and then all evening. While you may love this idea at first when you can’t get enough of the person, if this becomes a long-term relationship one or both of you may soon start to suffer from relationship burnout, and you’ll have nowhere to go to get some space.  

You also need to consider the stress that this will place on your life and performance at work.  For instance, what if you have a huge argument at home the night before an important meeting? Will you be able to be professional and avoid carrying that drama over to your workplace?  Even if you don’t say anything or make a scene in work, if one of you spends the whole day glaring at the other one, it will soon make the people around you start to feel uncomfortable.

Finally, what happens if you break up with that person?  The vast majority of workplace dating ends in disaster through one means or another.  How will you handle working in the same office as the other person, particularly if it was a very nasty breakup involving infidelity or emotional abuse?  The strain that this can put on your professional life is immense, and can even lead to you having to change jobs. 

These are all things to consider before you ask that cute guy or gal in Accounts out on a date!