How to Help a Shy Child Become More Confident

Some amount of shyness is to be expected in children when they enter new situations.  However, some children can be terribly, painfully shy for no apparent reason.  You may fear your child needs to see a personal counselor, but this is usually not the case.  There are several ways in which you can help you children boost their self confidence and become more social.

One of the best ways to give shy children that boost of confidence is to talk to them about the social situation they are about to encounter.  Oftentimes, there is no underlying phobia, but simply a lack of information and understanding about how to interact with others in different social situations.  Talk to your child and explain how to interact, even if it is as simple as, “When you meet new kids, make sure that you smile at each one and ask them what their name is.”

If the situation is completely new to your children, you might take the time to explain more of what it’s about.  It’s natural to be nervous about a new experience and a new setting, such as a church ceremony or school outing.  Explaining what is going on to your child will do a him or her a world of good.

You can also help alleviate shyness in children by introducing new people in limited numbers.  For instance, you can arrange a play date with one or two other children that you know your child will be seeing again in a larger social situation.  This provides your child with familiarity of those other children, and will help ease the tension in a new social situation.

Finally, if your child feels that he or she needs to be talking constantly to other children during a social situation, you can explain that a considerable portion of human interaction is nothing more than listening.  Tell them to ask questions and really listen to the answers before replying.  This can help set shy children at ease.